For the last 20 years or so my parents have been the senior class sponsors in Decorah. In our early years in town this was a big week for us because homecoming was in full swing. We would spend several weeknights at the fairgrounds decorating the senior float for the parade. The smell of spray paint still reminds me of this time.
My mom was also in charge of the homecoming vote counting for king and queen candidates. The current system is all electronic but it used to be paper ballots that my mom would hand count. I watched. Every year. It was never a secret to me who won. I could keep a secret with the best of them and not a tell a soul for almost two weeks. I think it is a great skill when you work in a business of confidentiality, but that is besides the point. After many years of counting votes and my own knowledge of who people were, my mom and I used to guess who was going to win the king and queen. We had a very methodical system for our guesses. Looking back, this is probably where my love of the human mind and psychology began. So far I haven't figured out a way to predict who will be on the ballot in the first place (aka be the top 5 or 6 from the entire class). Once they are on the ballot, we have a few theories as to how the winners come to be chosen.
1. The kiss of death: It sounds sad and definitely can be. Typically this person does not win the king or queen spot. They have won their class vote but do not win the whole school vote. Maybe they are well known in their class but do not have a lot of contact with underclassmen. There are a few exceptions. No one but the vote counter knows who wins the class. But when you're on the inside, you know who isn't going to win the final round of voting. Generally winning your class leads to not being the king or queen.
2. The tiebreaker/last in: This is my favorite one. My mom always wants even numbers of boys and girls on the court (either 5 or 6 depending on ties and such). Sometimes there is a tie on the girls' side and another boy is brought on the court, or the opposite. Often times (there isn't a tie for the top 5 every year so this one isn't always occurring) this person brought on in the final minute to even the sides becomes the winner. They almost weren't an option on the ballot and now they are the homecoming king or queen. Or, someone who just barely had enough votes to be the fifth one on the ballot becomes the winner. It's like coming from behind in a big game you didn't even know about.
3. Fall involvement: This sounds obvious but the activities you are involved with dictate who votes for you. Band, cross country, football, FFA. What do they all have in common? Activities with a lot of kids. Activities that have a large number of students provide a justification for when people decide to vote for their king and queen. This gets extra interesting when there are several members from the same activity on the court. This aspect is very similar to how political campaigns filter out, as groups are split. (Can you tell my dad was a government teacher?) For example this year's king candidates all play football. The cross country kids have to vote for someone as a king so they will pick a secondary set of activities to determine where they cast their vote. It comes down to a game of numbers and how teams and groups will divide their votes.
4. Younger family members in the high school: The surest way to win is having several younger siblings and cousins that are well liked within the high school. You could be a great person as a senior king or queen candidate but your bratty younger sister could bring you down. If your younger siblings also happen to get on the ballot and people see the repeated name, the older sibling is more likely to win. Whether the older king or queen candidate is even known by the younger grades doesn't matter. As long as there are multiple people with the same last name on the ballot at the same time, the older student is more likely to win.
So there you have it. You know how to be the next homecoming king or queen. Most of you have missed your opportunity to capitalize on your siblings and your own involvement :) Happy Homecoming Week!
Wednesday, September 27, 2017
Monday, September 18, 2017
Year of Yes
For Christmas my best friend gave me a journal by Shonda Rhimes (creator of Grey's Anatomy, Scandal, How to Get Away with Murder) called, "Year of Yes Journal." It was a very thoughtful gift and having a best friend who was an English major in college we have a tendency to buy gifts for each other that follow a reading and writing theme. Well, I started writing in it January 1. New year, new start, new year of yes. It was focused and easy to do. I had planned to write most days and finish the journal in just over a year if I could. I'm plan driven so this seemed perfect. I looked forward to reading it when the 365 days were completed and I could reflect on everything that happened and didn't happen in a year.
The premise of the journal is to chronicle all the things you say "yes" to over a year; the author found herself saying no to too many opportunities. The sections of the journal are themed by month, ranging from beauty to play to people to help and everything in between. There is also a section each day where you can write the ugly parts of the things you said yes to, called "dark and twisty," reminiscent of Cristina Yang from Grey's. She was my favorite character so this felt like an extra appropriate section for myself. Because the reality is there's a lot of crap in a day that can bog down all the good things that happen to us.
I started strong in the beauty section, writing every day for 6 straight days. January 1-6. Then I stopped. I don't remember the definite reason I stopped. I know there were a lot of things out of my control at the time and journaling just didn't fit in my schedule: my job was unstable, my sewer line was backing up on a regular basis, my fiancé was gone a lot for work, the list goes on and on. I wasn't saying yes to anything (except maybe Netflix) because I was worried about everything. I felt obligated to stay home and monitor my sewer and sump pump. I spent hours at night frantically searching and applying for jobs to find something before I could become just a number in a downsize effort. I was stressed and isolated, partly my own doing and partly my circumstances. It was a pretty big time of helplessness. I didn't feel like I was allowed to say yes to anything. There were no silver linings (and I can find the silver lining in about anything if I think about it long enough) and I hated everything.
But I'm back. I've said yes to a few great things this year already but they aren't in the book. Like my engagement, my wedding dress, being a bridesmaid in one of my own bridesmaid's wedding, a new job. They aren't chronicled but simply a stapled page in the beginning to remind me the entire year didn't suck. Sometimes it is difficult to think of those fun times when I remember how unhappy I was at the start of the year.
I'm writing in my Yes journal every morning at work (so 5 days a week). I check my email which is usually a bit depressing and then I think of something happy. I don't have to be to work immediately after I wake up in the morning so I usually spend time watching the news, coffee in hand, and a dog on my lap. These are all things I enjoy doing and I have the privilege of doing them daily. I put on a powerful lipstick color free from Clinique (even though my fiancé says it makes me look a bit pale and vampire ish). Side note: bought a new lip gloss at Target on Thursday and it makes me feel like I can take on the world. There is always something that has happened by 9am that makes me feel good about myself and saying yes to that decision is just the beginning.
Here's the challenge for you: go find that thing that makes you say yes everyday. Some days it is a promising opportunity to meet with a client. Other times it is a great lip color. Whatever you need to say yes to each day to make yourself successful, do it. Do it everyday. And do it with your whole being.
The premise of the journal is to chronicle all the things you say "yes" to over a year; the author found herself saying no to too many opportunities. The sections of the journal are themed by month, ranging from beauty to play to people to help and everything in between. There is also a section each day where you can write the ugly parts of the things you said yes to, called "dark and twisty," reminiscent of Cristina Yang from Grey's. She was my favorite character so this felt like an extra appropriate section for myself. Because the reality is there's a lot of crap in a day that can bog down all the good things that happen to us.
I started strong in the beauty section, writing every day for 6 straight days. January 1-6. Then I stopped. I don't remember the definite reason I stopped. I know there were a lot of things out of my control at the time and journaling just didn't fit in my schedule: my job was unstable, my sewer line was backing up on a regular basis, my fiancé was gone a lot for work, the list goes on and on. I wasn't saying yes to anything (except maybe Netflix) because I was worried about everything. I felt obligated to stay home and monitor my sewer and sump pump. I spent hours at night frantically searching and applying for jobs to find something before I could become just a number in a downsize effort. I was stressed and isolated, partly my own doing and partly my circumstances. It was a pretty big time of helplessness. I didn't feel like I was allowed to say yes to anything. There were no silver linings (and I can find the silver lining in about anything if I think about it long enough) and I hated everything.
But I'm back. I've said yes to a few great things this year already but they aren't in the book. Like my engagement, my wedding dress, being a bridesmaid in one of my own bridesmaid's wedding, a new job. They aren't chronicled but simply a stapled page in the beginning to remind me the entire year didn't suck. Sometimes it is difficult to think of those fun times when I remember how unhappy I was at the start of the year.
I'm writing in my Yes journal every morning at work (so 5 days a week). I check my email which is usually a bit depressing and then I think of something happy. I don't have to be to work immediately after I wake up in the morning so I usually spend time watching the news, coffee in hand, and a dog on my lap. These are all things I enjoy doing and I have the privilege of doing them daily. I put on a powerful lipstick color free from Clinique (even though my fiancé says it makes me look a bit pale and vampire ish). Side note: bought a new lip gloss at Target on Thursday and it makes me feel like I can take on the world. There is always something that has happened by 9am that makes me feel good about myself and saying yes to that decision is just the beginning.
Here's the challenge for you: go find that thing that makes you say yes everyday. Some days it is a promising opportunity to meet with a client. Other times it is a great lip color. Whatever you need to say yes to each day to make yourself successful, do it. Do it everyday. And do it with your whole being.
PS- Thanks, Kaitlin for the journal. I'm finally putting it to good use again and it's a godsend some days.
Wednesday, September 13, 2017
All Over the Place
This post might contain a little bit of everything but these are things that have been on my mind a lot lately. Some of them might resonate with you more than others but that's okay. Yesterday I turned 24. Not that I am old by any means but I spent a good chunk of the day yesterday in a contemplative state. A full day of phone calls and emails and meetings at work gave me plenty of time to sit and think. And here's what I thought about:
1. Expectations of failure never quite turn out the way we think. I had a track coach in high school who repeatedly said, "No fear of failure." It's a mantra I should have adopted in my garden this summer. I had never had a garden and didn't know what would happen. I anticipated more plants dying, not watering them enough, rabbits getting into the garden and eating the early plants, etc. None of it happened. I expected a certain amount of failure and now I'm up to my eyeballs in tomatoes. Also taking suggestions for what to do with so many of them...
2. Time goes faster the older you get. Last night I had drinks with a girl I met in preschool. We now find ourselves 20 years later living in the same city. It doesn't seem that long ago we were going to tumbling together every Tuesday night but now we have adult jobs and are living on our own. She told me about her brothers being well into their school years and I still picture them as little toddlers. Stepping away and not seeing something, be it people or buildings or cities, you realize how much can change in the blink of an eye.
3. Always use a travel coffee mug when transporting hot liquids in a moving vehicle. This one is actually from this morning. I spilled my coffee on my dress and car seat this morning as I was pulling out of my driveway. There was no time to turn around and fix it. I just had to go. Luckily I wore an abstractly patterned dress. Other than smelling like Mississippi Grogg coffee, I don't think anyone will notice the stain because it blends in so well. Nonetheless, use a lid whenever possible. Not that I didn't already know this but it's always a good reminder.
4. In the age of telemarketers I'm not surprised no one answers a call from a strange and unknown phone number. I make a lot of phone calls on a regular basis. I can only assume people don't like answering strange numbers because they assume I am some automated scam on the other line. They don't want to be bothered with such a nuisance. Maybe I'm wrong. Who knows but that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.
5. Why are we so bad at taking care of our own health but never miss a vet appointment for our pets? I haven't taken a multi-vitamin in weeks. My salad kick ended months ago. I haven't been great at working out lately because of an unpredictable schedule. But by golly I am going to the vet tonight so that my dog can get her monthly flea medication to take tomorrow. No way around that. I don't know at what point we start putting other people and pet's health in front of our own but it has happened to me and it makes me feel like a 40 year mom of 5.
1. Expectations of failure never quite turn out the way we think. I had a track coach in high school who repeatedly said, "No fear of failure." It's a mantra I should have adopted in my garden this summer. I had never had a garden and didn't know what would happen. I anticipated more plants dying, not watering them enough, rabbits getting into the garden and eating the early plants, etc. None of it happened. I expected a certain amount of failure and now I'm up to my eyeballs in tomatoes. Also taking suggestions for what to do with so many of them...
2. Time goes faster the older you get. Last night I had drinks with a girl I met in preschool. We now find ourselves 20 years later living in the same city. It doesn't seem that long ago we were going to tumbling together every Tuesday night but now we have adult jobs and are living on our own. She told me about her brothers being well into their school years and I still picture them as little toddlers. Stepping away and not seeing something, be it people or buildings or cities, you realize how much can change in the blink of an eye.
3. Always use a travel coffee mug when transporting hot liquids in a moving vehicle. This one is actually from this morning. I spilled my coffee on my dress and car seat this morning as I was pulling out of my driveway. There was no time to turn around and fix it. I just had to go. Luckily I wore an abstractly patterned dress. Other than smelling like Mississippi Grogg coffee, I don't think anyone will notice the stain because it blends in so well. Nonetheless, use a lid whenever possible. Not that I didn't already know this but it's always a good reminder.
4. In the age of telemarketers I'm not surprised no one answers a call from a strange and unknown phone number. I make a lot of phone calls on a regular basis. I can only assume people don't like answering strange numbers because they assume I am some automated scam on the other line. They don't want to be bothered with such a nuisance. Maybe I'm wrong. Who knows but that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.
And here's a cute picture of my dog to remind me to go to the vet tonight.
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